Should I or Shouldn’t I
March 27th, 2007
Should I or Shouldn’t I?
This morning as I was leaving for the day’s work Furry asked me if I could leave behind with him my journal. This journal. He was instructed by the on-duty C.O. that upon checking out, the staff up at ‘Records’ would be able to make a copy of the passage I wrote of him. Once done, I was told that it would be returned by 6:00 pm this evening. To say I was reluctant would be an understatement. I twice looked to the on-duty C.O. for assurances that it wouldn’t go mysteriously missing. This journal means everything to me. As a matter of fact, I’m beginning to think that it’s the whole reason that I’m here. The information I’m compiling in these pages, though at points meandering and at other points lacking substance, is proving to be an irreplaceable account of jail house life. With as close to a guarantee as I could get in such circumstance, I complied. Upon my return at day’s end my journal was sitting on my bed along with a note from the Fur Dog. It seems that contrary to what he was told, they wouldn’t allow for the copies to be made for him. Instead he left me details on where to send him a copy myself. Something I’ll have to write out for him in a letter. In his parting note he signed off, ”You made me think different of peaple (misspelled and scrubbed out).. humans. Dog out, woof, woof. P.S. Find your place to piss in the doghouse! Peace out.“
Last night, I pondered whether to include Furry in what has become a custom for me. Writing a send off passage in honour of those departing. I certainly had my reasons not to. It is not as though we were close by any means. But in the interest of being complete, the interest of rendering as full a texture of my experience here and not disregarding my observances of Sean’s contribution to this place, I chose otherwise. And for that, this was rewarded. I’m glad I made the decision I did.
Shucking Oysters: Sleepy Time, Beddy Byes
Shucking Oysters: Sleepy Time, Beddy Byes
Alex Allen
I’ve noticed lately that many of us are not getting enough sleep. It seems every second person I talk to has been up since four in the morning. Is there something going on? After a little research, I found it usually starts with the business of relieving oneself in the middle of the night. Once that happens, it’s over. Lie wake until the alarm goes off. Or worse, finally fall asleep just before the alarm goes off, which is my nocturnal pattern. And the incessant thoughts … who wouldn’t want to spend their nights contemplating consciousness and the morphogenetic fields of quantum energy?
Just type “sleep better” and you get 159,000,000 search results. 17 Proven Tips, 6 Tips, 20 Ultimate Tips, 8 Secrets, 15 Science-Backed Tips, and on and on. I know a few people who take medication to fall asleep. As we know, most pharmaceuticals come with a two-page side effects disclaimer. Sleeping medications are no different: dizziness, drowsiness, abdominal discomfort, dry mouth, headaches, and strange dreams.
According to the Sleep Foundation, replacing your old mattress can improve the quality of your sleep by up to 55%. Given the bedding standards on our islands, this is important. We started out with a dead lumpy futon; when one of us got out of bed, the other would roll into the middle. Then there was the guy who sold us a $300 “top of the line hotel mattress” that was so springy, the first night I thought we were in the middle of an earthquake. (I think that mattress was from the honeymoon suite.) Finally we invested in a brand new firm mattress from that place with the really catchy jingle. I highly recommend the investment. After all, think how much time you actually spend in bed. According to the Sleep Matters Club, the average person spends about 26 years sleeping in their life which equates to 9,490 days or 227,760 hours. That’s one third of our entire lives spent asleep in bed. And not surprisingly, we also spend seven years trying to get to sleep — a total of 33 years or 12,045 days.
According to a report, about 30% of Canadians have insomnia. Being severely sleep-deprived can be compared to consuming excess alcohol. For example, staying awake for 18 hours is comparable to having a blood alcohol content (BAC) of 0.05%. The BAC increases to 1% after 24 hours of no sleep.
The Mayo Clinic among others, recommend that we stick to a sleep schedule, watch what we eat and drink before bedtime, have a restful cool and dark environment, and manage our worries. And stop using electronics at least an hour before bed; the blue lights stimulate your brains, not your sleep.
Long ago I tried Sleepy Time tea, which is a joke. Sure you fall asleep, and then you wake up hours later — to relieve yourself. Instead of sheep, I used to count how many lonely bachelors there are. Then I switched to dogs. Start at the ferry terminal and work my way up Mount Road. I was exhausted by the time I got to Central. I tried a mantra: sleepy time, beddy byes, sleepy time, beddy byes….over and over. And then the alarm went off.
I once had a neighbour who had a rooster that would cock his doodle at 12:00 am and continue on for another three hours. After over a week of sleep deprivation I thought I was going insane. Which is not too far from the truth. A 2018 research review examined 21 articles on the correlation between time spent without any sleep and symptoms of psychosis. Based on results gathered from 760 participants, the researchers noticed that people start experiencing the first symptoms within 24 to 48 hours of not sleeping. These symptoms typically include: distorted perception; anxiety and irritability; not feeling like yourself and loss of time and sense of orientation. The review also suggested that symptoms of psychosis rapidly progress as more sleep loss is experienced. The good news, sleep deprivation psychosis is typically not permanent and can be resolved by getting some sleep. It kind of explains homelessness and mental challenges.
Bon vivant, Gayelord Hauser, recommends “mental cocktails” for deep sleep. The recipe must have five ingredients: some sound, some sight, some taste, some odour and some touch. “For sound I take the soothing theme of a lullaby, the lullaby from Erminie which I have always loved. For sight I go to the little front room of my home so far away in New York, and from the south wall I take a picture of Renoir, a picture of a peaceful man, an elder, sitting under a tree outside a rural inn-door. For taste, I use the remembrance of tree-ripe peaches as I picked and ate them in Taormina only a few short weeks ago. For odor I add a gardenia from my California garden. And for touch, I add the remembrance of the cool, refreshing waters in which I swam just two days ago— the waters of the Mediterranean.” He mixes these things that he loves and have always given him pleasure, things he associated with peace and calm and relaxation. Hauser assures us that our mental cocktail will help us sleep and have sweet dreams too.
It’s been weeks and I am still tweaking my mental cocktail recipe. A dash of Bach or a dollop of Chris Luno Ibiza mix? A sprinkle of Pachena Bay tide flow or the Wyeth print on my studio corridor? A Fire Cracker Volcano Roll with spicy tuna, crab meat, avocado, seared spicy tuna, yam fries with yuzu mayo, unagi sauce, and Korean spicy sauce? Or Crabby Bob’s Crab Platter with crab, oysters, mussels, clams, prawns, swimming scallops, garlic butter and seafood sauce? The odour? Sage and Sour flower or maybe Indian spices heated in a frying pan. And touch? Still debating on my dog’s fur or the smooth surface of an Arbutus tree.
In the meantime, I think we have over 100 dogs on Hornby.
Routines
March 24th, 2007
Routines
I suppose I have an established routine when it comes to my smoking. I mean aside from the obligatory timing of it. You know, after meals and such. This routine is that I go to my room, don my coat and then proceed for the great outdoors. Once finished my butt, I return to my room and shed my outer layer of red. Coat goes on. Smoke gets smoked. Coat comes off. A routine I’d like to think is not so out of the ordinary and certainly one not so conspicuous. But alas, in this place it is.
Friday night at present and the range is engrossed in a movie. For a change, I’ve decided to watch along. Feeling the urge for a smoke, I get up to engage in my routine and I can’t help but sense Jerry’s eyeing me as I do. Emerging from my room, coat on, I sift through the guys seated willy-nilly just outside my door. As I pass Jerry he makes effort to small talk. “How’s it going?” I respond, “not bad,” without breaking stride. Immediately, he gets up and heads to his bed space at the opposite end of our range. I don’t know. It just struck me as odd timing, so I stopped to confirm my suspicions and picked up the movie I had just put down. I stood in my coat with one eye on the flick and the other down the hall to see if Jerry would re-emerge. A minute later, he returns to the dining hall/movie room wearing his coat. Rather than sitting himself back in his seat, he saunters over to me asking, “Do you have a smoke I could bum?” I couldn’t believe it! Bad enough that it is only Friday, five full days before the next canteen. Bad still, that he looks past my growing disdain. Even worse that I sense his constantly sizing me up. But to top it all off, he most presumptuously goes and grabs his coat and puts it on BEFORE even asking me IF I’ll give him a smoke! The gall of this guy leaves me flabbergasted! I’m accustomed to variations on this theme but they only occur Tuesday and Wednesday. Friday is completely lame. And what the hell do I do, but give him a fucking cigarette?! If I can’t learn to say ‘NO,’ he sure as hell won’t learn to stop grinding me. This much became apparent with this latest episode. I did put off a most obvious look of dismay before capitulating and, while outside, I did my best to freeze him out as he lamely went on about the weather. Despite my cooling mood towards Jerry, I worry that I’ve stumbled upon another routine of sorts. He went to fetch his coat upon spying me undertake my routine for christ sakes. And I noticed it as plain as the bars that remind me of where I am. Good God!
Tomorrow’s Saturday and a new day begins. Full of nic-fitting. Just as one spends less money when they have some over when they do not, so too is the rhythm of the nicotine craving. When you have tobacco, you’re more at ease. You partake more methodically. When you don’t have tobacco, you’re ill at ease and you crave it incessantly. Hence this whole dimension I perceive to Jerry’s come on. It is truly irksome. The question will be, ‘Can he take the hint? Develop some pride? Conjure up some willpower or find someone else to lean on?’ One thing is for sure. I can’t, nor do I want to, support someone’s habit for five full days. I may as well quit myself at that rate. Either that or learn to say ‘NO!’ My problem with standing my ground with such a simple word, coupled with his now unabashed abuse of my kindness, is that eventually I will back him off in no uncertain terms. That, I fear could cause problems that I never asked for, by simply trying to facilitate someone’s need. It will be very interesting to see how this progresses… or digresses.
Just stepped out for a late night butt, given how cigarettes are clearly on my brain. ‘Routine,’ after all. I’ve been writing away all evening and realized it’s now 1:20 am! Adorned in my red overcoat neath the dull amber hue of the lone light in the courtyard, I found myself reflecting on this whole ‘jail’ thing. There’s little doubt most everything about this place sucks but, after having endured over two months of incarceration, I can say from experience that the routine that revolves around smoking; craving it, its scarcity, the grinding that lurks around every corner, is the biggest strain of all. If everybody could take care of themselves in this respect, life here would border on tolerable. Ah, but I guess that is what makes jail, jail!
Damn!
My momma told me there’d be days like this.
Phoenix Riting! – September 14th, 2023
Things have quieted considerably (as anticipated) with the advent of September. Most businesses remain open through the shoulder season with reduced hours, and we are tapering off more gently than in the past. The Farmer’s Market continues through Thanksgiving; a small core of hardy marketers will make their wares available in the Copse, but not I! After this next market, I’ll dismantle my tent and set it up for the Fall Faire, and then I’m finished for the year. I admit, I’m going to miss it.
After a busy and satisfying blur of activity, our winter leisure season, busy though it is in its own way, can be anticlimactic. “Is that all there is? Where’d everyone go?” There will be meetings, of course, radio shows, events, some semblance of social activity, but it’s a lonely season. We’ll settle in, adapt, adjust, as we do, but there is a pang. I personally love the cyclic nature of life on Hornby, not just the seasons of nature but the human seasons too, the rising of human tide over the summer followed by the ebb of winter. Walking the length of Big Tribune Beach in the off season when you’re the only living human around is quite the feeling, and I wouldn’t miss it, but adapting takes time.
On a more difficult subject, I’m struggling with a response to what I learned in last week’s Grapevine editorial, that I had been publicly accused of transphobia in the DIBB, without my knowledge. I never saw that conversation as I was not tagged in it. I don’t know what was said, nor the reason for such an accusation. The definition of ‘transphobia’ as I understand it is, expressing or inciting violence, fear, hatred or disgust toward trans people, which I have definitively never felt or done. My issue, as I have clearly stated, is not about trans people but rather the right to freely discuss changes and ramifications of the rule of law in this country, and the impact on other vulnerable groups who are not being considered.
TIG has been criticized in the past for airing controversial opinions, ‘anti-vaccine,’ ‘conspiracy theories’ and the like, while the editor has, quite correctly, defended the right to free expression within the limits of clear editorial guidelines. Nothing printed in this paper has so far engendered the punitive reaction that my little column from July has. There have been real-world repercussions to the editor for publishing my words of ‘hate,’ while at the same time I’ve received several private expressions of heartfelt support for my ‘sane, fair and balanced’ approach. For these, I am grateful!
Laws passed swiftly can and do have unintended consequences. The punitive silencing of public conversation about feared or actual consequences does not suppress the conversation, but forces it underground, where it festers, distorts and can become real hate on both sides. I fear the potential backlash to our current extreme ‘zero-tolerance for opinions’.
Most ordinary Canadians are confused and full of questions which have no answers except top-down definitions and slogans. Folk are told, in effect, “Because we say so, now shut up.” It’s shocking, the vehemence with which these new rules are enforced, not only by law, but by social pressure and public opinion. Simply raising the subject for discussion is not only discouraged but actively forbidden and punished. What on earth is going on? Questions merely amplify when they go unanswered.
Here’s one problem: we are arming the CPC with exactly what they need to step in with a change of government which would bring sweeping changes in the law. For those of us who are not political conservatives, this is frightening. Remember the Harper regime? The rollbacks of environmental protections and rights? We need to talk.
No law is written in stone in a democracy, and suppression of expression merely empowers the pendulum to swing hard and far. Nobody wants that except actual bigots, who obviously exist. But broad brushstroking anyone with an opinion or questions as a ‘transphobic bigot’ does no one any favours, most especially trans folk. Cognitive dissonance is the rule these days, but pretending the issue away will not prevent a backlash.
I have faith in the power of community. I believe in inclusion, which means everyone, not just the people who agree with me. Real inclusion is not possible without speaking and listening. There is a middle ground between extremes, and I believe that is where the truth lies, but it takes work to discover and implement it. I don’t know how we can manage that, but we have to start opening our minds to people we believe are wrong and listen for the common ground.
That’s what I think. What do you think? Seriously. Email me at phoenixonhornby@gmail.com
Caitlin Johnstone – Notes from the edge of the narrative matrix
Crazy, Unrealistic People Vs Rational, Realistic People
| CAITLIN JOHNSTONE |
| SEP 15 |
Crazy, unrealistic people believe all our systems are rigged for the benefit of the rich and powerful.
Rational, realistic people believe all our systems happen to benefit the rich and powerful by pure coincidence.
Crazy, unrealistic people believe the mass media feed the public lies to manufacture consent for agendas which go against public interests.
Rational, realistic people believe the media are telling the truth, and the public just naturally enjoys supporting wars on the other side of the planet and domestic policies which make them poorer and sicker.
Crazy, unrealistic people believe drastic, revolutionary changes are needed to create a just society which works for everyone.
Rational, realistic people believe a just society that works for everyone can be achieved by participating in political parties that are explicitly set up to prevent a just society that works for everyone.
Crazy, unrealistic people believe drastic revolutionary changes are needed in our society to avoid an environmental collapse that is already well underway.
Rational, realistic people believe the environmental collapse that is already well underway can be avoided by making small, incremental changes over the next several centuries.
Crazy, unrealistic people believe the US empire has lied about its every war, and is also lying about the current one.
Rational, realistic people believe that while history has shown that the US lied about all those other wars, this time it’s definitely telling the truth.
Crazy, unrealistic people believe the US empire amassing war machinery on the borders of its top two geopolitical rivals is an extremely provocative act of aggression designed to advance the empire’s geostrategic objectives.
Rational, realistic people believe the US amassing war machinery on the borders of its top two geopolitical rivals is an innocent act of defense.
Crazy, unrealistic people believe government agencies are spying on us and working to censor the internet.
Rational, realistic people believe that too, but they think it’s a good thing.
Crazy, unrealistic people believe a status quo of nonstop war, militarism, nuclear brinkmanship, ecocide, exploitation, oppression and authoritarianism is untenable, and must be dismantled by any means necessary.
Rational, realistic people believe we can just ignore those problems and think about more pleasant things.
Crazy, unrealistic people believe that the only way to achieve desperately needed change in a society whose systems are rigged for the powerful is to disregard those rigged systems and use the power of our numbers to force the end of the injustices we face and the creation of new systems.
Rational, realistic people believe we can get the changes we need if we just vote a little harder in the next election.
Crazy, unrealistic people believe the definition of insanity is continually doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
Rational, realistic people believe doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results just might work this time.
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BRICS
BRICS Sally Campbell
Brazil, Russia, India, China, South Africa: What do they have in common? They comprise BRICS, the group we’d do well to keep our eyes on. Formed in 2009 after the global financial crisis, they jointly decided to pursue other ways to respond to the World Bank (WB)’s and the International Monetary Fund (IMF)’s grip on their economies/stringent policies on lending. Helena Cobban’s research on Globalities, a branch of her Just World Education site, shows that in the decision-making of the World Bank, the US vote counts for 15.64% of the total vote, while that of the original five BRICS nations combined Is 14.24%. No wonder BRICS is creating its own system of global finance. Their focus for their first decade was on trade, the dollar, sanctions, development and infrastructure finance.
They are part of what is now being called the “majority world”, and 40 other nations in that world are clamoring to join them. Of those, 23 countries have formally applied to join BRICS, including 7 of the 13 oil-producing countries. At their late-August summit in South Africa, they accepted six new members, (now becoming BRICS +). They are Argentina, Egypt, Ethiopia, Iran, Saudi Arabia, & UAE.
How different an idea this is from the Western concept of the “3rd world” or even the “developing world”. Remembering how language shapes thinking, it’s time to give our heads a shake and examine the myths we hold about Western superiority, the cultural conditioning many Westerners consider to be unshakeable reality, and how we define “developed”. Maybe our language needs to become more inclusive; certainly our thinking needs to.
Our ingrained, often unconscious racism may lead some to simply judge or fear BRICS as a threat or perhaps to dismiss its rapid growth by ignoring or minimizing it. So maybe this is a time to learn more about BRICS. Here’s a few things they are not:
They are not a socialist or even an anti-imperialist bloc.
They are not a military alliance.
They are not attempting to be a moral force in the world.
They are not trying to take over the world.
Their interests are geo-economic, related to having a sustainable way of life in the countries they live in. They are trying to cooperatively build their own economies, out from under the grip of US/Western hegemony.* For instance, they are offering loans to their member countries without the austerity provisions of the IMF. 30% of those loans are in local currencies.
The US, and to a lesser extent, the EU, currently have sanctions in place against dozens of countries. Naturally, Russia has been sanctioned for its invasion of Ukraine. To the surprise of many, Russia’s economy only diminished by 2.2% in 2022 (John Power, Aljazeera, May 20,2023). After the 2022 sabotage and destruction of its Nordstream Pipeline to Germany, Russia diverted its energy exports from the EU to China, Turkey and India.
And as so many countries are being sanctioned these days, BRICS members are trading in their own economies and gradually leaving the dollar behind. Their bank is called the New Development Bank (NDB), intended as a counterpoint to the WB & the IMF. The NDB has authorized capital of $100B, no small change.
In 2009, Head of Economic Research for Goldman Sachs’ Jim O’Neill described BRIC (before South Africa joined in 2010) as including the “largest emerging markets” in the world, growing faster than the G7. He stated that G7 should “be adjusted to incorporate BRICs representatives”. (Progressive International, No.34: Dismantling Northern Hegemony BRICS by BRICS, July, 2023) This didn’t happen, and now O’Neill’s research assistant, Roopa Purushothaman, is chief economist to India’s TATA Group, whose $106B market capitalization value is three times that of Goldman Sachs. The times they are a-changing. Speaking of which, thanks to Music from the Deep Dark Woods’ King Anderson for playing Frazey Ford’s stunning version of that Dylan song last week on Hornby Radio CHFR! Well worth a listen indeed, a fresh take on a song as relevant as ever. Back on topic: The G7 countries – Canada, France, Italy, Germany, Japan, US, UK and the EU had a 70% share of the global economy in the 1980’s. That share has now diminished to 44% today. (Aljazeera, above) These are rather startling numbers, not ones we often hear in mainstream media. Will we pay attention and ride the horse the direction it’s going?
Here’s more from Progressive International’s 34th weekly news bulletin: “The BRICS is not a moral force. But its development is part of a historical process that sees Northern hegemony wane and splinter. That process presents opportunities for progressive forces around the world to engage with critically”. That gives me hope.
We in Canada, a mid-size power, would do well to cease our sabre-rattling against China, lobby for an immediate cease-fire and negotiations to end the Ukraine War, and attempt to maintain and extend our economic ties globally. We have a global climate crisis to attend to, after all, and this summer has shown we are far from immune to the ravages of global warming.
* “Hegemony is the phenomenon whereby one group leads the whole by projecting its interests as the collective interests” (Progressive International, above).
Two Feet or a Saddle
Two feet or a saddle
by Mr. Unknown:
Back in the day
Before cars were in sight
People lived in community
A sustainable life.
People found ways to skedaddle
By foot or by horse
Two feet or a saddle
With no remorse.
They got by
Two feet or a saddle.