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A Love Letter to Canada and NATO’s Budget  

A Love Letter to Canada and NATO’s Budget  

By Cylon2036  We/Us

There comes a time in every civilization when it must ask the truly important questions. Could the Canadian and NATO defense budgets be even larger? Is there room in the national budgets for one more stealth aircraft with a name that sounds like an energy drink? The answer, naturally, is yes.

Why stop at offensive weapons when we can have offensive weapons with premium features? Every announcement of another hundred billion dollars in military spending should be accompanied by fireworks, orchestras, and commemorative mugs. If spreadsheets don’t make military analysts weep tears of patriotic joy, then have we really invested enough?

But what about the Russians, Iranians, and Palestinians? Clearly, the only sensible response to every geopolitical headline is to commission more weapons systems, with continual explanations by Prime Minister Mark Carney about why this procurement cycle is different. History may be complicated, diplomacy may be difficult, but procurement timelines are forever!

Critics mutter about costs, priorities, or diplomacy. They simply fail to appreciate the majesty of a NATO alliance where every challenge can be met with another acronym and another line item in the budget. Peace, after all, is best celebrated by ensuring accountants in government ministries never know sweet relief. One can only dream bigger! 

Such a puzzle will never be fully solved

Gabriel Jeroschewitz, June 19th, 2026,

Such a puzzle will never be fully solved

I have spent the better part of forty-seven years reading verses of this old and half-mad nature – verses that the British Library keeps in one of its back-shelved corners. The poem that started it all was more of a tangled riddle than a lament, but one loaded with references to the Green Man, Merlin of the borders, the Picts and the coming of the Gaels – and a whole host of other half-remembered mythic names that make ones head spin. The verses referenced elements like the knee-high nineteen forties”, the waist-high nineteen fifties” and even the middle row” that would put the answer down”. Such nonsense tends to come from children scribbling after long nights of history lessons – so I, a wry old observer of absurdity, could not help but smile.

The tone was decidedly dark, as if the writer had swallowed an entire tankard of mead whilst reciting the lineage of Britain from the days of Noahs brother Parthenon to the arrival of the flaxen sons of Mil. The verses spoke of the green the garden and poetry attest their artistry thus and otherwise” and of the comings and the goings in the high and far off times stacked and dried”. I saw it all in such a dim corner of the reference room, whilst watching the motes of dust dance in the light of one of the museums cracked windows. It was a perfect example of how we – the living – try so desperately to piece together a past that refuses ever to solve itself.

It was on a blustery Thursday afternoon when I took a wander through the museums newly developed wing – a glass-covered annex built to exhibit Ancient Britain. The walls were a sombre grey, as befits the displays of axes, bowls and stone circles that always seem to spring up where either Romans or Druids have trodden. The exhibit I paused at featured a group of statues – described in the catalogue as celestial guardians, rendered in a contemporary medium.” While somewhat vague descriptions applied to both group and statues, I thought this was an ideal spot to linger – something I am wont to do when confronted with such order outside the world.

The statues featured impressive heights – far beyond any human figure – and were formed entirely from Rubiks cubes. Each cube occupied a different shade of the original six colours. The group nonetheless presented an impression of a body – a torso of red, blue and green squares, long and slender legs that ended in a point at the ankle and arms that stretched outward towards the air. The most striking aspect was that each figure was completely nude; the limbs, marked out by the cubes, featured a faint, translucent glow in the spaces between the squares. The entire creation appeared as though fashioned from light trapped inside a childs puzzle game.

Standing here, my eyes adjusting, I heard a soft rhythmic clicking – the sound of a Rubiks cube being turned somewhere in a quiet room. The figures appeared to be moving – albeit without any particular purpose or intention – taking tentative steps to find a comfortable resting position upon the floor. The long legs of interlocking squares featured a gentle sway whilst the cubes that formed torsos made very small increments of rotation. It was as if the figures engaged in an endless silent game, endeavouring to solve themselves – a puzzle that could never be completed in any state of completion.

I could not help but laugh – a short dry chuckle at such an echoing corner of stone walls. The vision was utterly absurd yet profoundly beautiful and faintly unsettling all at once. The figures of cold plastic possessed a naïve innocence – like newborn angels exploring existence in its naked state. The long legs – each a column of interlocking squares – displayed a mechanical grace but also a whimsical element. Such faces – if they could truly be called faces – were just a single row of cubes slowly rotating in one direction after another.

One of the angels paused as its torso rotated a full ninety degrees – as if it saw me directly. The cubes lining the face” aligned for only a momentary fraction of time to form what almost looked like a smile – before scattering once more. I felt a chill – not from fear but from understanding that these creations were attempting to answer a question that has haunted humankind since the dawn of staring up at the stars. What are we? The angels cubes made a soft, soft noise, as if the answer lay just out of reach – perpetually just a twist away.

I stepped closer and whispered the words: You are the answer to a puzzle that never was.” The cubes shivered – the red squares flashing in recognition – and the whole figure deepened to a shade of amber. Yet just as quickly as it brightened, the glow faded, and the statue settled once more into its silent shuffling.

The rest of the exhibit passed before me as a blur of ancient stones and even older stories, but my mind remained fixed upon those Rubiks cube angels. The long legs brought thoughts of the verses describing the knee-high nineteen-forties” and the waist-high nineteen-fifties” – arbitrary references to time and humanity. I thought of the Picts who were clean as clams, witty and thick as thieves,” followed by the flaxen sons of Mil” who came after them, each trying to make their mark upon the land and upon the riddle of belonging. I thought of Merlin – the wizard of the borders – who, legend says, turned in his river grave whilst waiting for a time when the stones would speak again.

When I exited the museum, the sky was a bruised purple – twilight at work upon the old stones and making them look like bruised fruit. The wind carried the scent of damp earth and the distant tolling of a church bell for vespers. I made my way home with the verses of the poem still rattling through my head like a half-solved Rubiks cube. The night remained dark, yet the streetlights flickered with the same glow as the angelscubes. Such was the feeling I could shake – somewhere deep in the hidden corners of this grey old island there surely are beings formed out of coloured squares attempting to work out what they truly are.

I am an observer – a man of middle age who watched the world try to solve itself. The poem, the museum and the angels all fit – a jumble of history, myth and absurdity. Such a puzzle will never be fully solved. Yet perhaps that is precisely the point – we are all Rubiks cubes in our own ways. The angels, beautiful and nude, with long legs formed of interlocking squares, will continue to shuffle and click and wonder about existence – whilst I, for one, will continue to watch the show – a wry smile adorning my lips until that very day when the cubes finally align.

Scarytale

Scarytale pt.3 of 3     

by Quinn Ireland                                          

                                           Larry:

Lawrence and I stared at this giant circus tent for what seemed like hours, but it was only minutes. The height of the tent is taller than most of the trees that circle around the clearing. Hundreds of ropes are staked into the ground holding the tent upright, while the entrance to the tent is wide open.

Shoul.. Should w… we g…g… g go che.. check i.. i… it out?”

Lawrence spoke in a shaky tone;

I… its r…r… real.”

I had so many questions. How is this myth real? When did this get here? And most of all; Why is there a creepy circus tent in the middle of the forest?

I want to check it out.” I said calmly.

You can come if you want.”

Are you crazy?” Lawrence whined

What good would come out of checking this place out, it looks creepy as hell!”

Isnt this the whole point of our adventure anyway?” I spoke.

We were hoping to find this, and now you dont want to go explore it?”

I just didnt expect it to be real, would you, Scary? Did you believe that it was real before now? Did you?!”

Shhhhhh, quiet down. Okay, I didnt think that we would find this, but lets at least peek in the door.”

Lawrence thought about this for a minute.

Fine. But well just peek in the door, no going inside.”

Together, we creep out from the trees and into the open click our flashlights on. We pad across the field until we reach the tent. The canvas for the door is rolled up to the sides to reveal the well-lit inside of the tent. 

You look first.” Lawrence says.

No, well both look, on three. One… two… three!”

I couldnt believe what was inside.

         

                                         Lawrence:

Three!” Scary said. We both peered into the tent. 

It looked as if the circus had been going on while we were in the woods. 

Clowns held by thin cables hung, suspended in mid-air. A lion had its mouth wide open as if it had just been doing a roar!” And all the white lights pierced our eyes. We both ducked behind the door wide-eyed and mouths hanging open. 

I gotta get a better look.” said Scary. He sat up and looked back in.

No! Dont, Scary!” I said while pulling him to the ground. 

Why not, I want to see what that was… wait! Do you have your camera?”

Yeah.”

Give it to me, I need some proof.”

Fine, just get one picture and get well get out of here.”

I rifle through my backpack until I find it. My prized possession. I had saved up for the camera for years, I bring it everywhere I go. I hand it to Scary. He points it around the corner of the door, and it goes off: 

Click!” 

Got it, lets move” he yells. 

We run back to the edge of the clearing and turn back to take one more look at the massive circus tent, before turning around. Right into a clowns face.

                                                  Larry:

There we were. Standing at the edge of the woods staring into the horrific face of a clown. Arrrghhghh!!” We ran past the tent, but the clown followed in a fast pursuit. We then circled the tent and, a few moments later, we were back at the front door of the tent. 

I think we lost him.” said Lawrence breathing heavily. 

Yeah.”

Lets go in the tent.”

Yeah, well hide there.”

We duck through the door into the tent. Only, there is no light inside the place that had been blinding just minutes before. 

I dropped my flashlight outside!” said Lawrence 

Damm, I did too.”

We scramble around the tent before hunkering down in the corner. Then a faint light flickered across the tent from where we were sitting. Suddenly, all the lamps turn on at the same time. The clown is standing right in front of us. 

                                          Lawrence: 

There was a clown standing silently in front of us, grinning and chuckling. Then he charged.

Ahhhhhhrggg!!!”

 We both screamed. Now the clown stood about a foot away. 

YOU GOT PRANKED!!!!”

All sorts of people pop out of separate places. I recognize Mr. Underburrow, the shopkeeper, Mrs. Kate, the preschool teacher, and even Axe man, nobody really knows about him. We understand now, this whole story was a fairytale. A scarytale. Glad that theres no school tomorrow, Mrs. Ruchill would make sure that I get the most doo doo grade possible. Maybe I’ll go to Scarys house, but I’ll consider it after my heart stops pounding from fear. 

And so, as the two boys walk home in the wee hours of the morning, they know that this adventure will always be remembered. The scarytale…

Mt. Arrowsmith

Peter Christopher Rothermel 14 OCTOBER, 1950 – 5 MAY, 2026

Mt Arrowsmith remains a familiar landmark known by its memorable rocky profile on the southern horizon as seen from Hornby and Denman, Now enclosed by a 1300-hectare protected park, it was previously at risk of development. One person in particular led the process of protecting the area: Peter Rothermel of Qualicum who persisted for 12 years before finally succeeding. He recently left us that generous legacy on 5 May 2026.

In the context of rapid development here on Hornby and Denman – especially up against behemoths of big money and bureaucracy – I appreciate the reminder that one person can make such a difference for so many.

 

Cupcakes & Cow Pies

Letter to the Editor – Doug Rennpferd

Dear Grapevine.

This is a response to Gabriel Jeroschewitz’ recent stories involving the historical figure Jesus as a kind of literary device.

I don’t know wha impression of Jesus other readers, if they are even many, make from this kind of writing.

But we are living at a time when, at the end of a long decline of Christian culture accompanied by all the disastrous effects the gospel predicted it would have; the greatest majority of us know little to nothing of Jesus, his historicity, his deeds and words, and his resurrection…

So adding to people’s scanty impressions of a man who claimed a unique central divinity to mankind and history, are someone’s words put in the mouth of Jesus – words he would never says they are in contradiction of what he said and did.

This to me, has the flavour of a vulture pecking at a corpse. But of course Christ is not that corpse. Because the resurrection of Jesus was well attested a the time I happened.

If I have a bone to pick, it is about the author making their Jesus and Nietzsche agree; because they really were diametrically opposed in their message. Nietzsche championed the glorification of one’s will, whereas Jesus said that he did nothing of his own accord, but only what his father would have him do. This is an important distinction in a world that has become sick with self-worship, a blueprint for society that big business and global institutions encourage.

I also wondered if the writer would show a similar lack of cowardice if they wrote about Mohammed to a Muslim audience.

But the central force of Christianity is a living sacrifice, a lamb that told his followers to forgive and even give their lives up to their antagonists.

That is a juicy carcass indeed…

Finally, to have Jesus say God is dead is the most perverse kind of misrepresentation. Jesus who said all power was given into the Son: who was transfigured on Mount Hermon; of whom when Thomas saw his resurrected Master, said, “my Lord and my God.” For more uninformed people, God is not dead nor is Jesus and they are the same person who loves us.

Sincerely, 

     Doug Rennpferd

Well, At Least Lindsey Graham Is Dead

Well, At Least Lindsey Graham Is Dead

Reading by Tim Foley:

The only positive thing about the Iran war heating up again is that Lindsey Graham won’t be around to enjoy it.

The bloodthirsty South Carolina senator breathed his last on Saturday, succumbing to what his office describes as “a brief and sudden illness” after a political career dedicated to promoting wars, airstrikes and proxy conflicts at every possible opportunity.

People have long poked fun at the hypocrisy of Lindsey Graham living as an obvious closeted gay man in a political party with a virulently anti-LGBTQ platform. I personally have always found Graham’s sexual attraction to men a lot less interesting than his sexual attraction to acts of mass military slaughter.

Ever since the death of Graham’s dear friend John McCain, nobody on Capitol Hill has been able to match his gleeful enthusiasm for the shredding of human bodies using high-priced war machinery. Wherever there was any debate about dropping bombs, launching missiles, toppling foreign governments, arming proxy forces, or imposing starvation sanctions, you could always count on Lindsey Graham to be the first and loudest voice arguing in favor of more death and destruction.

Graham has personally taken credit for persuading President Trump to begin the war with Iran. In the months leading up to his unexpected demise, the senator had advocated for direct US military interventionism in Iran, Cuba, Venezuela, Yemen, Nigeria, Lebanon, and Palestine, and had just returned from a trip to Kyiv promoting the US proxy war against Russia. He was literally pushing for more war and military expansionism until the very end of his life.

All the world’s worst people are publicly expressing their grief about the loss of their beloved war slut, from Trump to Benjamin Netanyahu to Itamar Ben-Gvir to Tom Cotton to Mike Huckabee. Meanwhile, everyone who’s not a warmongering psychopath is having a splendid day.

Of course we’re seeing imperial narrative managers like Piers Morgan wagging their fingers and chiding their audiences not to speak ill of the dead, but the hell with them. We’re not doing that. Politeness is not more important than Lindsey Graham’s victims. The liberal desire for propriety and nice feelings does not outweigh the importance of naming and shaming Graham’s frenetic scramble to murder as many human beings as he possibly could throughout his evil, miserable life.

Lindsey Graham is dead, and it is good that he is dead. May his omnicidal ideology soon join him in the arms of the cold, cold ground. May the insane, insatiable god he worshipped cease to gain recognition on this planet.

Lindsey Graham is dead. At least that’s one good thing. No matter what else happens today, they can’t take that away from us.

___________________

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Some Enchanted Evening

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