I used to dread November every year. After all, my birthday was over, Thanksgiving done, not yet ski season, light diminishing daily, arrrgh, far away from family and friend celebration time, especially Solstice in our case (you can fill in your own event here). And oh the music of the holiday season. If you can avoid the canned, overplayed “pop” carols which, like french fries, are so great to begin with, such old familiars, but unlike old friends, pretty quickly become soggy and tiresome – there is so much wonderful music at year’s end. But November means we’re not there yet. I mean, aren’t we still in the fall? My November-is-miserable mind labored hard to resist the inevitable. I guess that “inevitable” part didn’t occur to me.
This is one of the real gifts of being old. Things that were not apparent during my earlier years have become really clear, in some cases, and it makes my life so much easier. My mindset around November is an example. So, I really did not look forward to November despite the fact that it occurred every year without fail, truly without fail. What was I thinking? In the past, I dealt with the annual negativity by working a lot during November which turned out to be a pretty good strategy if you are a person who loves their work, as I did.
Now that I don’t work anymore, I needed a different strategy. I didn’t want to be busy and accomplishing all the time. I remember starting T’ai Chi Ch’uan with Doreen Hynd when I was age 63. I fell in love with it my very first lesson. Very soon after, I “gave myself” 7 years to learn the practice well enough to be able to teach it. This I knew was ambitious, given that Doreen herself went back to the very beginnings of her practice and “began” all over again after 12 years of learning. That was her lesson to me about beginner’s mind. It took me maybe a year into lessons with Doreen to realize that I actually could just simply enjoy what I was doing and not have to become proficient at it. Doreen never spoke to me of that, but nonetheless it was a lesson I learned from her. T’ai Chi Ch’uan (“The Practice of the Essence”) is a life-long learning event. And the joy is in the journey because you never will reach perfection. The perfection is being in the pattern of movements that comprise the Wu style which Doreen taught. The perfection is in the practising; there is no end goal.
I receive so many lessons from this practice, as I would expect with any ongoing learning experience that ideally takes place outside, involves movement, the senses, and a quiet mind.
Now I realize I appreciate November more each year. This time of noticing and engaging in the little things. The time of making applesauce and soup, of going to bed a bit earlier with that book, of lighting the fire with gratitude for where we live. Time of the hot bath or savouring the long hot shower. Just getting outside whatever the day; that makes the difference for me. Small things like warm socks. Contacting a friend I haven’t been in touch with for awhile and renewing the connection. I also like the cooking part of these early darkening evenings – just having something “local” on the stove or in the oven brings good feelings – food prepared locally, sold locally, grown locally, I love that we can do this, living here on our treasure islands. What do you like best about November?
