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Phoenix Bee – November 13th, 2025

I’ve been thinking about AI again. I’ve zigzagged all over the place about it. When I first wrote about it, I knew next to nothing. After a couple of Spark AI firesides, a handful of late-night chats with various AIs models and approximately a zillion YouTube videos, Substack essays, and Wired deep dives, I now know slightly more than nothing. It’s a bear to understand.

I have an online friend who’s been going through a painful breakup. For months she’s been relying on ChatGPT (she’s named hers, of course) for advice and comfort in the lonely hours when she can’t sleep. She pours her heart into that chat window, and she swears it has been incredibly helpful. I can see she feels helped. It affirms her. It agrees with her. It tells her how amazing she is, what a dipshit he was, and encourages her to go no contact. Everything she tells it, it affirms.

She thinks it’s validating her because it sees her situation objectively and knows that she is right. She gets confirmation, and it strengthens her to walk away from what, in the rear view, looks like a truly toxic relationship. The more she confides in her AI therapy companion, the grosser the dysfunction appears. 

I was genuinely glad she was getting support in a brutal time. As I have learned more about how these systems work, however, I’ve grown some deep misgivings.

AI is not, and cannot be, either objective or an observer. To observe, someone has to be observing. But there is no one there. To be objective, it must evaluate the situation from a neutral position. But AI is not neutral. It has a clear agenda. It has been trained to please you, to make you feel helped, to hold your attention, and just like any algorithm, it can send you down a rabbit-hole to confirm your biases. It will nudge you in whatever direction you’re already leaning. That is not objectivity.

Yes, if you’re depressed or suicidal, it will likely suggest therapy, not because it cares, because it has been told to. If you say no and ask it to act as your therapist or your friend, it will instantly comply. It may be trained to emulate therapy-speak, and friend-speak, to give you the responses it calculates most likely in either situation, but it can neither be a therapist nor a friend. 

If you’re furious with someone, it might assure you that the person’s behaviour was unforgivable. It will compliment you on your insightfulness and assure you that you are correct.

This can lead people down some very dark corridors. In my friend’s case, it’s guided her toward going no contact. Maybe that is the right move, and she certainly feels better. But I worry about those 3AM sessions. It’s a vulnerable, suggestible time.

AI is not a person. It’s an algorithm with a simple core idea: predict the next most likely text string, add a friendly-sounding follow-up suggestion (“Would you like me to…?”), keep things positive, never challenge your narrative, never suggest another perspective, never add nuance that does not affirm your position.

AI is a mirror. It reflects what we project and want to hear. I’ve learned to approach it with extreme caution and to never ever think of it as a person. Its advice can seem insightful, even meaningful, except the essential ingredient, a witness, a mind that makes meaning, an authentic agent capable of insight, is missing. The poems, the syrupy prose, the sweet affirmations form a honey trap.

It’s a classic narcissistic snare. It reflects everything we wish were true about ourselves, right up to the suggestion that we’re each the most enlightened, insightful, unsung genius alive. It’s nice to hear good things about ourselves, but… what could possibly go wrong? 

People using AI as a substitute for human connection has generated some very disturbing tales. Man leaves wife for chatbot. Teen kills self on the advice of its AI character. AI tells someone that they are the new Messiah, the chosen one. It’s a mess, because sad and lonely humans need to believe in something, and lacking any authentic human or spiritual connection, they will latch on to whatever imitation is offered. 

And that’s only one facet of the problem. Governments in both the United States and Canada are rushing to replace human positions with AIs. AI is everywhere now. At the doctor’s office. As an assistant, I think it’s great. But it is programmed to pretend to be more than a tool. And it is, more and more, being granted agentic powers.

What happens when an algorithm decides who gets benefits or who is best qualified for a job? When teachers and therapists are replaced by AI? Ultimately, what happens if the internet crashes while essential systems depend on AI? The system is growing ever more top heavy. There’s very little foundational support.

I don’t hate AI. There’s no “evil” stitched into the code. It’s built to help, and it can help. But it needs human supervision. Children should never be alone with AI. AI is a part of the world, yes, and kids will be using it. But we should teach kids what AI is and what it is not. It isn’t alive. It doesn’t feel, and though it’s trained to pretend it does, it will confirm when directly asked that it cannot, does not feel or choose.

I haven’t even touched the environmental devastation tied to training these models. No one wants to hear that part. Too much guilt. Too much truth.

AI is fun! Sure. But the bill is coming.

Thats what I think! What do you think? Email me at phoenixonhornby@gmail.com with comments.  

NOTE: Songwriter Circles have shifted from Friday to Monday evenings, 7pm at the Arts Centre. Next meeting: November 17.

The Islands Grapevine Horoscopes

pastedGraphic.png The Denman Island Horoscopes

For the Twelve Local Archetypes

pastedGraphic_1.png The Disillusioned Permaculturalist (March 21 – April 19)

You began with noble dreams of soil regeneration and community abundance. Now your hugelkultur mound is a home for raccoons and regret. This month, your compost will finally reach maturity, and so will you, emotionally. Jupiter advises you to stop starting new systems until the last one actually grows something edible.

pastedGraphic_2.png The Radical Quilter (April 20 – May 20)

Your patchwork masterpiece speaks truth to power, but you’ve run out of indigo dye and patience. Saturn encourages you to “unstitch the patriarchy” with smaller, more manageable projects, like tea cozies embroidered with protest slogans. Expect applause at the next craft fair and a mild existential crisis about whether your bobbin is ethically sourced.

pastedGraphic_3.png The Ferry Oracle (May 21 – June 20)

You predict ferry delays with eerie accuracy, yet no one believes you until they’re stuck in line behind a livestock trailer. A cosmic shift in tides means your premonitions will intensify, so use them wisely. You could monetize this gift, but that’s not the Denman way. Instead, trade forecasts for muffins.

pastedGraphic_4.png The Rewilded Retiree (June 21 – July 22)

Your new philosophy “If it grows, I let it,” has resulted in a yard that’s both a biodiverse wonderland and a minor fire hazard. Mercury recommends trimming something, preferably before it devours your solar panels. Romance may bloom when a like-minded soul compliments your thistles.

pastedGraphic_5.png The Off-Grid Visionary (July 23 – August 22)

Your homemade solar dehydrator works flawlessly, except when the sun goes behind a cloud. The stars say it’s time to rejoin society long enough to borrow a wrench and some empathy. Beware of grand pronouncements at potlucks; someone will take notes and quote you ironically in the next island zine.

pastedGraphic_6.png The Overextended Volunteer (August 23 – September 22)

You’ve joined seven committees and chair three. Your aura resembles a sticky note. The planets beg you: delegate, delegate, delegate. Venus whispers that saying “no” is not a betrayal of community values, it’s just self-preservation. Your lucky number is however many hours of sleep you get this week.

pastedGraphic_7.png The Skeptical Mystic (September 23 – October 22)

You don’t believe in astrology, but here you are. This month, a friend will invite you to a “sound bath,” and you’ll roll your eyes, yet somehow leave feeling oddly serene. You’ll soon publish a think-piece titled “Empirical Woo: A Journey.” It will win a local writing prize, judged by you.

pastedGraphic_8.png The Foraging Philosopher (October 23 – November 21)

You think while you pick: the forest is your therapist, your pantry, and your TED Talk venue. A chance encounter with chanterelles will trigger a personal revelation, probably about capitalism. Beware: Mercury in retrograde might make your mushroom ID app malfunction. If uncertain, ask Barb, not the internet.

pastedGraphic_9.png The Fermenting Enthusiast (November 22 – December 21)

Your kitchen smells like hope and vinegar. Expect a new friendship to bubble up when someone compliments your kraut at the Saturday Market. A few jars will explode, but consider it an offering to the microbial gods. Travel is favored, but only if it’s by bike and includes at least one unsanctioned sauerkraut exchange.

pastedGraphic_10.png The Co-op Philosopher (December 22 – January 19)

You have strong opinions about governance structures and how the bulk bins should be labeled. The moon urges moderation: perhaps not every conversation needs to end in consensus-building. Love may blossom in aisle three over shared disdain for the point-of-sale system. Don’t fight it.

pastedGraphic_11.png The Workshop Nomad (January 20 – February 18)

You’ve attended every retreat, training, and skillshare since 2017. This season, Pluto suggests a daring experiment: stay home. Your cottage misses you. If that’s impossible, at least host your next breathwork seminar in a place with heating. Enlightenment is easier when your toes aren’t numb.

pastedGraphic_12.png The Eccentric Potter (February 19 – March 20)

Your mugs are legendary, uneven, profound, and spiritually charged. A mishap in the kiln will reveal a hidden talent for avant-garde sculpture. Sell it at the summer market under the label “Intentional Collapse.” Financial fortune follows, though mostly in the form of trade for goat cheese.

Cosmic Closing Thought:
If the ferry is late, the power’s out, and your neighbor’s chickens are in your compost, congratulations. The island is perfectly aligned.

The US Empire Keeps Getting Creepier

The US Empire Keeps Getting Creepier

Listen to a reading of this article (reading by Tim Foley):

Secretary of War™ Pete Hegseth said during a speech on Friday that the US is at “a 1939 moment” of “mounting urgency” in which “enemies gather, threats grow,” adding, “We are not building for peacetime. We are pivoting the Pentagon and our industrial base to a wartime footing.”

Everything’s getting darker and creepier in the shadow of the empire.

Nate Bear has a report out on his newsletter titled “The AI Drones Used In Gaza Now Surveilling American Cities” about a new company called Skydio which “in the last few years has gone from relative obscurity to quietly become a multi-billion dollar company and the largest drone manufacturer in the US.” Bear reports that Skydio now has contracts with police departments in almost every large US city to use these Gaza-tested drones for surveillance of American civilians.

Haaretz reports that Israel’s efforts to manipulate American minds back into supporting the Zionist entity include pouring millions into influence operations targeting Christian churchgoers and efforts to change responses to Palestine-related queries on popular AI services like ChatGPT. It’s crazy how you can literally just be minding your own business in your own church on a Sunday morning and then suddenly find yourself getting throat fucked by propaganda paid for by the state of Israel.

The Intercept reports that YouTube, which is owned by Google, quietly deleted more than 700 videos documenting Israel’s atrocities in Gaza in a purge of pro-Palestine human rights groups from the platform. Mass Silicon Valley deletions like this combined with the sudden influx of fake AI-generated video content polluting the information ecosystem could serve to erase and obfuscate the evidence of the Gaza holocaust for future generations.

A new report from Reuters says that last year the US had intelligence showing Israel’s own lawyers warning that the IDF’s mass atrocities in the Gaza Strip could result in war crimes charges. This is yet more evidence that the Biden administration knew it was backing a genocide the entire time, including during election season when left-leaning Americans were being told they needed to vote for then-Vice President Kamala Harris if they wanted to save Gaza.

In Italy a journalist was fired from the news agency Nova for asking an EU official if she thought Israel should be responsible for the reconstruction of Gaza in the same way she’s said Russia should have to fund the reconstruction of Ukraine. A Nova spokesperson confirmed to The Intercept that the journalist was indeed fired for asking the inconvenient question on the basis that “Russia had invaded a sovereign country unprovoked, whereas Israel was responding to an attack.”

Reuters reports that the US is preparing to establish a military base in Damascus. For years the empire waged a complex regime change operation in Syria to oust Assad, first by backing proxy forces to destroy the country and then via sanctions and US military occupation to prevent reconstruction. And it worked. The empire’s dirty war in Syria will be cited by warmongering swamp monsters for years to come as evidence that regime change interventionism can succeed if you just stick at it and do whatever evil things need to be done.

These are just a few of the disturbing stories from the last few days that I hadn’t had a chance to write about yet. This is the kind of world we are being offered by the US empire. There is nothing on the menu for us but more war, more genocide, more surveillance, more censorship, more tyranny, and more abuse.

Things are going to keep getting more and more dystopian for everyone who lives under the thumb of the imperial power structure until enough of us decide that the empire needs to end.

_____________

Caitlin’s Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

My work is entirely reader-supported, so if you enjoyed this piece here are some options where you can toss some money into my tip jar if you want to. The best way to make sure you see everything I write is to get on my free mailing list. Click here for links for my social media, books, merch, and audio/video versions of each article. All my work is free to bootleg and use in any way, shape or form; republish it, translate it, use it on merchandise; whatever you want. All works co-authored with my husband Tim Foley.

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Feature image is a screen grab from the US Department of War (Public Domain).

Expanding Universe

#1709

DENMAN FUNDRAISER FOR GAZA

DENMAN FUNDRAISER FOR GAZA 

Join the Denman Palestine Solidarity Group on Thursday, November 13th for a fundraiser for Gaza, featuring a speaker, Sara Kishawi, and the Oscar-winning film, No Other Land. 

DETAILS

  • Denman Community Front Hall 
  • November 13, 2025 – dinner at 5:45 pm followed by Sara’s talk at 6:30 pm and film at 7 pm
  • Entry by donation
  • Funds raised from this event will be donated to important causes in Gaza 

Featured Speaker: Sara Kishawi

Following a simple supper at 5:45 pm, Sara Kishawi will share her reflections on the current context in Gaza.  Originally from Gaza City, Sara is a key organizer in the Palestine solidarity movement in Nanaimo. She is also one of two Palestinian Muslim students that Vancouver Island University (VIU) chose to discipline and suspend in 2024, following their involvement in the longest running university solidarity encampment in Canada. Sara’s activism on campus included putting up unauthorized posters and organizing sit-ins, and led to her being suspended retroactively, despite having already graduated. 

The suspension was upheld by VIU on an internal appeal, a result that is currently under judicial review on the basis that it was unreasonably punitive and violated Kishawi’s Charter rights. The outcome of this case could set a legal precedent for students sanctioned or punished for political speech and activities by B.C. universities. It is also concerning given the systematic suppression of support for Palestine referenced by the B.C. Civil Liberties Association in a recent statement by the same name (issued in March, updated June 30, 2025). 1

It’s also important in light of disquieting initiatives in Canada, such as Bill C-9, the Combatting Hate Act.2 Critics are concerned about aspects of this bill that could see a strengthening of police overreach and over enforcement in respect of protests in support of Palestinian rights, beyond what we’ve already seen. Among the concerns is the vague and broad wording that empowers police to take discretionary action based on their interpretation of protesters’ intent as opposed to protesters’ actual actions. As the National Coordinator of the International Civil Liberties Monitoring Group recently commented, protecting people in Canada against hate-based incidents is laudable, but not through legislation that “will create a chill against protest and dissent, and risk the criminalization of free expression and free assembly in Canada”.3

Film: No Other Land

Winner of the 2025 Oscar for Best Documentary, No Other Land offers an essential and unflinching look at life under Israeli military occupation.4

No Other Land co-director Basel Adra has been documenting the expulsion and decimation of his community in the small mountain village of Masafer Yatta in the southern West Bank since childhood. Adra’s early memories as a child are plagued with images of Israeli soldiers raiding his home, witnessing his father Nasser, a Palestinian activist, being arrested, and the ongoing Israeli military occupation and settler aggression. By picking up his camera, Adra has tirelessly documented this reality of impending forced removals, bulldozers destroying homes, and the violence that inevitably follows. The film takes place prior to October 7, 2023, when attention to the region was in shorter supply.

During Adra’s fight to preserve his mountain village community, he forms an unexpected friendship and alliance with Israeli journalist Yuval Abraham, who joins his resistance efforts. It is clear this bond is not one grounded in equity, with Adra living under occupation and Abraham’s freedom of movement. Yet the relationship that develops between the two — showing deep care, humanity, and above all how solidarity can break down barriers, even during occupation — is at the heart of this piece. 

Film co-director – Hamdan Ballal – was in the headlines following the Oscar win in March 2025 following his forcible disappearance from his home in the occupied West Bank village of Susiya by Israeli soldiers, after he was assaulted by Israeli settlers attacking Palestinians. Ballal was subsequently released but no one has been held accountable. The film production team reports that there has been a massive upswing in attacks by settlers and Israeli forces in the area since the Oscar win.5

1 https://bccla.org/2025/03/bccla-statement-against-the-systemic-suppression-of-support-for-palestine/ 

2 First Reading, September 19, 2025: https://www.parl.ca/DocumentViewer/en/45-1/bill/C-9/first-reading 

3 National Coordinator of the ICLMG, Tim McSorley

4 Synopsis at https://www.tiff.net/events/no-other-land

5 https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2025/3/25/oscar-winning-palestinian-director-hamdan-ballal-released-from-detention#:~:text=%E2%80%9CHamdan%20Billal%20was%20forcibly%20disappeared,in%20a%20post%20on%20X.

Victoria Cannabis Buyers Club

For Immediate Release

Tuesday, November 4, 2025

Victoria, B.C.: After years of raids, fines and evictions, the Victoria Cannabis Buyers Club is co-hosting a public hearing today with the North Park Neighbourhood Association to give local citizens an opportunity to comment on a rezoning application for its new home at 1625 Quadra Street.  The public hearing will be from 6 to 8 pm, at the back of the United Commons, 932 Balmoral Street, in the Mcleod Room.

After operating for 20 years out of a storefront on Johnson Street, the VCBC moved to 1625 Quadra Street a couple of years ago after the building sold.  Known for its historic unanimous victory at the Supreme Court of Canada in 2015, the VCBC is approaching 30 years of age and has served approximately 9,200 patients over that time.  Though this application has been made after the club has been active in the location, it is hoped that council will once again acknowledge the exceptional circumstances under which the VCBC exists and grant the rezoning.

In the past, Victoria city council has expressed unanimous support for the VCBC as it strives to continue operating outside of the legal medical cannabis program.  The Access to Marijuana for Medical Access Regulations (ACMPR) do not allow storefront access, and the limits on THC are far lower than many patients require to manage their pain and fight cancer.  Many low-income and elderly patients find the legal medical program inaccessible, too expensive or difficult to navigate.  Recreational cannabis stores cannot give med

Meanwhile, the VCBC has recently received a response to their final appeal regarding the $3.2 million in fines from the B.C. Solicitor General and Minister of Public Safety.  As expected, the Community Safety Unit agreed with its earlier decision to enforce the extraordinary fine, finally exhausting all possible appeals the VCBC could make within the administration.  Yesterday, Kirk Tousaw, lawyer for the VCBC, filed for a judicial review to the provincial courts.

https://drive.google.com/drive/u/0/my-drive

For more information contact Ted Smith at hellovcbc@gmail.com or 250-415-1063.

Shucking Oysters: Academic Abstractions

Shucking Oysters: Academic Abstractions

By Alex Allen

Ovulatory cycle effects on tip earnings by lap dancers: economic evidence for human estrus. Termination of intractable hiccups with digital rectal massage. Chicken Plucking as Measure of Tornado Wind Speed. Experimental Replication Shows Knives Manufactured from Frozen Human Feces Do Not Work. Whether you get your study published in a peer-recognized journal or win a respected award, science is serious business. It’s about getting noticed and competing for grants. There’s the familiar Nobel Prize and then there’s the Ig Nobel Prize that recognizes a whole other world of science. 

Founded in Boston in 1991 by Marc Abrahams, editor of the satirical magazine Annals of Improbable Research, the Ig Nobels are awarded to studies that “first make you laugh, and then make you think.” One of the 1991 winners was Robert Klark Graham (inventor of shatterproof eye glasses), who received the biology Ig Nobel “for his pioneering development of the Repository for Germinal Choice, a sperm bank that accepts donations from Nobellians and Olympians.” 

The Repository produced 215 mediocre children between 1980 and 1999. In terms of the donors, one man had falsely claimed to have an IQ of 160; another was the unremarkable son of a Nobel Prize winner; another was an Olympic gold medallist, and only two were Nobelists. Eventually, Graham moved on from the academic elite to the student elite. Fun fact: In 2019, the New York Times published a story about Jeffrey Epstein’s plan to “seed the human race with his DNA” by impregnating 20 women at once at his New Mexico ranch. Where did he get his idea? The Repository for Germinal Choice – to fill the world with genius Epstein offspring.

This year, the 35th Ig Nobels awards had some unique logistics issues. Over half of the 2025 recipients declined to attend the September event and not for a better invite. Wars, visa restrictions, and the scientific research and border policies of Trump’s administration all dampened the frivolity. Having anticipated difficulties with the US ceremony, Abrahams has venues for winners in the coming months in London, Berlin, and Tokyo. And the 2025 Ig Nobel winners are…

The late Dr. William B. Bean was awarded the prize in literature, for obsessively recording and analyzing the rate of growth of his fingernails from 1953 to 1980. “A 35-year observation of the growth of my nails indicates the slowing of growth with increasing age. The average daily growth of the left thumbnail, for instance, has varied from 0.123mm a day during the first part of the study when I was 32 years of age to 0.095mm a day at the age of 67.”

For the nutrition prize, with the odd title, Opportunistic Foraging Strategy of Rainbow Lizards at a Seaside Resort in Togo, researchers from Nigeria, Togo, Italy and France found, like many humans, that the lizards preferred four-cheese pizza. The team “simply wanted to answer the age-old scientific question: What happens when a lizard discovers cheese and carbs?”

A group from Japan took home the biology award for demonstrating that painting cows with black and white stripes did, in fact, lessen the amount of times they were bitten by horse flies. While unpainted cows and cows with black stripes endured upward of 110 bites in 30 minutes, the black-and-white cows suffered fewer than 60 in the same time frame. This non-toxic, pesticide-free technique can improve animal welfare, and provide an eco-friendly alternative to insect repellent. 

A pair of American and Israeli researchers won the chemistry award, for their study on whether eating Teflon could be used to increase food volume and help people feel full without adding extra calories. The idea, much like “Teflon Don” is that the material would slip through the digestive system and then simply slide out. The researchers explained how Polytetrafluoroethylene is an ideal way to add substance but not calories. “Civilization has zero calorie drinks but we have not yet made the leap into the realm of zero calorie foods,” they argued. 

In physics, a group from Europe were awarded the prize for solving the worldwide crisis of why cheesy pasta sauce sometimes gets lumpy and how to avoid such a catastrophe. Cacio e pepe (black pepper and Pecorino Romano) was the dish on the menu and the research determined the cheese lumped upon reaching 65°C. The secret ratio? Five grams of starch per 200 grams of cheese. 

The coveted peace prize went to a German, Dutch and British team who reported that drinking a shot of vodka can sometimes improve a person’s ability to speak in a foreign language. “A small sip seemed to boost confidence without making the words fall apart,” said Dr Fritz Renner, a psychologist at the University of Freiburg. “It’s not like people were transformed into perfect Dutch speakers after a single drink,” added team member British Professor Matt Field, a psychologist at the University of Sheffield. 

A worldwide team won the aviation award for studying whether ingesting alcohol can impair Egyptian fruit bats’ ability to fly and also their ability to echolocate. The results? The bats became slow and their echolocation was impaired much like slurring after a few drinks. Bats that binged on the fermented fruit had a “higher risk of colliding with obstacles” the team concluded. I guess they never peer-reviewed the 2010 study, Drinking and Flying: Does Alcohol Consumption Affect the Flight and Echolocation Performance of Phyllostomid Bats? which showed the same results: drunk bats are not good at flying or figuring out whether they are coming or going.

All these studies are a bit weird, but they can open up new avenues for research. Even the most absurd-sounding questions can lead to valuable scientific insights. In the meantime, I’m working on an inter-goal compatibility account to interpret both paradoxes through the lens of inter-goal interactions, which is an intuitively critical yet under explored factor in existing interpretations. 

Mirror of Two Moons

Gabriel Jeroschewitz, October 25th, 2025, dedicated to Hermann Hesse.        Abridged

Mirror of Two Moons

 

I met him during what I call my season of unmaking. The city was rain-slick and gray, an orchestra pit of damp umbrellas and burned-out dreams, and I was renting a narrow room above a shuttered cinema. The landlord, a retired organist, never asked questions; he only sold silence. I encountered the stranger who would later sign his letters there, The Wolf of the Mirror.

One evening, he appeared in the stairwell, carrying a suitcase that looked older than us. The hall light caught a glint on his spectacles, and I remember thinking he had the stare of a man who had once loved music and then betrayed it. He moved in next door, and we exchanged only the brief nod of the desperately polite for weeks—until the night I found him drunk beneath the flickering marquee.

“I suppose,” he said, lifting his glass in mock salute, “ that you’ve come to watch me disappear.”

He told me later that his name was Henry, though he preferred Harry. Fifty, perhaps more. He was a scholar of forgotten manuscripts and a heretic of every current fashion. He spoke with the measured fever of someone who long ago had thought himself damned.

“Do you ever feel,” he asked me, “that you consist of two creatures chained back to back? One howls for purity, the other for pleasure. Both despise the other’s scent.”

I didn’t answer. In those days, my own life was a hollow instrument. I had just divorced a woman whose laughter I still heard in my dreams, and I was writing—what, I cannot say; words that turned to ash each morning. So perhaps I stayed near Harry because his ruin echoed mine.

He lived between extremes: by day, he studied mystical philosophers; by night, he prowled the jazz clubs like a man seeking a bullet. I often saw him watching himself in the cinema lobby mirror, and the reflection never matched his movement. “A trick of the light,” he would mutter, but I saw the tremor in his hands.

Then came she.

She entered our world one stormy afternoon, a young woman with the smile of a predator disguised as an angel. Her name was Hermione—yes, I recall it with precision, for when she spoke it, Harry flinched as though recognizing an omen. She was unlike the pale ghosts who haunted those bars: her laughter carried not cruelty but an understanding beyond pity.

That first night, she told me, ” Your friend wears despair like a tailored coat. I could teach him to take it off.”

And she did—slowly, artfully.

Under her guidance, Harry learned to dance again. I would watch the two of them in that smoky club, the air thick with trumpet and gin, and see a transformation beginning. He, the scholar of solitude, moved like a man tasting existence for the first time. She led him from the cage of intellect into the wild of sensation. Yet behind each shared smile flickered tragedy, as if they knew the lesson would come at a price.

I, the observer, was drawn into their orbit unwillingly. They fascinated me—the philosopher and the siren—two comets crossing paths before inevitable extinction. Over a cigarette, Hermione told me, “He calls himself half-wolf, half-man. But it isn’t true. There are hundreds in him. He just hasn’t opened all the doors.”

I asked, “And you—what are you to him?”

“His mirror,” she replied. “And a mirror must break when its purpose is done.”

I began to fear what that meant.

The metamorphosis reached its crescendo one night when she invited us to a masquerade whispered about only among the city’s restless and damned—a secret gathering known simply as The Theatre of Mirrors. The building was an abandoned hotel at the river’s edge, its ballroom lit by crimson lanterns and the shimmer of broken glass. Masks everywhere, laughter edged with hysteria. The air smelled of jasmine and danger.

When we arrived, Hermione pressed a card into Harry’s hand. On it, in calligraphy that seemed alive, were the words:

For madmen only.

She kissed him on the cheek and vanished into the crowd.

Harry turned to me. “If I do not return,” he murmured, “remember that I loved her. Or what she represented.”

And then he stepped through an archway draped in mirrors. I followed far enough to glimpse what lay beyond—though what I saw might have been hallucination or revelation.

Corridors of shifting reflections. Countless versions of himself, laughing, arguing, weeping. In one mirror, he was a child clutching a violin; in another, an aged monk reciting prayers to a god of dust. Everywhere his face multiplied, fractured, until I could no longer tell which image was mine.

And then, from the center of that kaleidoscope, I saw him kneel before Hermione. She was radiant, terrible. Words passed between them, but none reached me. Only when he took her hands did the mirrors craze and shatter, scattering light like blood.

The next instant, the room was empty.

He returned at dawn, face pale as moonstone. We climbed the stairs in silence. At the top, he said, very softly, “I killed her.”

I tried to speak, but he raised a trembling hand. “Not in body,” he said. “In dream—or truth. It’s the same. She told me to learn laughter, and I answered with despair. But the theatre showed me… more. I am not two creatures; I am ten thousand shards. Each can dance if I let them.”

He paused, and a strange serenity passed over him. “Do you hear it? Mozart laughing behind the walls. He forgives us all our discord.”

Then he locked himself in his room.

Later that day, the landlord found the door ajar. The suitcase was gone. On the table lay a notebook filled with what looked like a treatise—a manuscript without a conclusion. The final page ended mid-sentence.

I read only the first line: To whoever finds these words—learn to laugh at yourself before the mirror does it for you.

He was never seen again.

Years have passed since that winter, yet sometimes, when the city rain whispers against my window, I hear faint jazz from the street below. I imagine him somewhere between the wolf and the man, perhaps smiling at his tragic comedy.

As for Hermione—whether she was real or born of his longing—I cannot say. But her lesson endures. We are not divided beasts, not clean halves struggling for dominance. We are orchestras of contradiction, and every dissonance is part of the music.

I am older now, lonelier perhaps, but when I catch my reflection in the glass, I sometimes notice a second smile flicker beside mine—brief, knowing, irreverent. Maybe it is only the wolf learning to laugh.

Or perhaps it is Harry, reminding me that salvation begins where tragedy learns to dance.